I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
