Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Randomize