She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
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