oh god the rape fog is back!
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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