Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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