I puked a lego.
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
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