i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
Randomize