thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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