Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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