i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
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