your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
