ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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