This phone does not accept mass texts. Try again.
I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
Randomize