Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
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