problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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