Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Randomize
