you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
