At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
She announced her abortion via fbk
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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