How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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