so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
