all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Randomize
