Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
Do vagina's smell?
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize
