Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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