yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
