Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
