she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
