My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
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