i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
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