She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
Randomize
