dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
