and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
You're so nebulous sometimes
I hate all girls vehemently.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
Everclear isn't food dammit
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
