you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
Randomize
