You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize
