I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Randomize
