He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
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