Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Randomize
