puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize
