Umm I'm too high to move.
Too much gin, very little bucket
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
