I swear she didn't look like that last week.
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Randomize
