I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I just had sex on a roof
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
I lost the right to judge tonight
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Randomize
