Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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