it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
Randomize
