you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Randomize
