New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
