You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Randomize
