why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize
