I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
