have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
