i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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