The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
Randomize
