she was so not down for the gang bang
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
